Tuesday, 30 June 2009

My new "breakfast".

Morning, Park,

Yoga, Book.

Breeze, breath.

Night, Light

How many times I had walked at night,
to library, or 24 hours computer cluster?

The weak yellow road light guided me,
my shadow followed me.

And the moon, sometimes, heavy cloud, at the dark night.

Sometimes I sang on the way home.
Usually around midnight, or 1 am.

I sang, cause I feel happy at that time.
I felt content after hours studies.

At lonely nights, walking under the weak light, or moon,
or with darkness, I still can feel joy in my heart.

The girl, carried with books, walking on the road.
In winter, in spring, in hot summer.

She is alone, but she isn't lonely.

She is always happy with the companion of books.
Though she walks at a dark night.

Monday, 29 June 2009

Be Joyce

No more tears.
No more worrys.
Stop being emotional.

Who made you cry is not your Mr.Right.

You are Joyce.

Wednesday, 24 June 2009

Phd ?

Q: Why PHD? Though I enjoy reading, I enjoy doing research, but the problem is that my life can't be only surrounded by books. I prefer going out, talking to people, for example, being a journalist.

A: Phd is a 3 years work, you need a good plan to finish it. It doesn't only mean sitting in the library, you also need spare time or even a part time job. for example, you can do research for 3 or 4 hourse per day, and do something else for the rest of time. Well, it depends on your interests. In addition, PHD student with journalism background is very valuable.

A: Female PHD means ugly, old, and divorced in your country?

Q: True. But I want to be a charming female PHD. Haha..

I hate my house

It's true.
I hate it. Always.

It is black to me. It's dirty, the facilities are old and hard to clean. Though I cleaned, it will become dirty soon.
It is balck to me. The people are black. They are indifferent, self-centered. They are not my type at all. They always concern money, money.
Thus I am lonely, always.

I miss my flat in China. Where I live was always bright, clean, pretty. It was decorated with pink, green, and all kinds of lovely staffs.

I miss my flat.

I will move out this dark place as soon as my contract ends. I want to find a lovely place, with freindly flatmates, but it's merely a dream which couldn't come true?

Why lose weight?

1. for the summer

2. for the summer

3. for the summer

4. uncomfortable with my increasingly fat waist

5. want to be a dynamic, slim, pretty lady

6. healthy, healthy and pretty.

7. exercising is a good habbit.

8. far away from depression.

Goal: 5 kilogram in 2.5 months.

Outing to the Abbey

with" my baby",am I like a qualified mother?..haha

What a lovely evening .

Organized by the international student club, we went to the Abbey at evening. It's a nice place, with old buildings and pretty grassland, luckily the sun was there , cloud and rain disappeared.

Wen, a lovely Chinese girl, who is doing PHD in electronical engineering, helped me a lot to take photos, carry bags.
Dika, a cute Indonesia baby, ran around the grassland, and was unwilling to take photo with me even I caught him. We ran a lot together, what a dynamic naught baby!
Andy, one of the organizer of this outing, told us a lot of history about the Abbey with his standard English, he speaks without any accent though his hometown is Bermingham.
Afterwards we were invited to Andy's house where his wife, Linda prepared some food for us. Andy shared with us his love stories with Linda. what a lovely couple! Oh, yes, I saw some cute gerble( desert mouse) in his house.

I realized that an outing is always helpful to cheer me up. I am the person who love the nature scenery and around by people, then I won't feel lonely.

One more delightful thing is that I took a lot picutres, I am happy to see I was happy on the photos.

Only yourself can help you

You feel depressed once a month, normally around the date of 20th.
Caught by it again, without suprise.

You started to call freinds, you felt isolated, you need them to company with you. You started to sleep, for a long time, you thought sleeping can make you forget all difficulties, and yes, you thought there are a lot of barrels standing in front of you. You started to reflect yourself, you got confused about yourself, you lost clues about what you want to do in the future, again, they made you lost confidence.
You felt incredibaly lonely.

Gesus, damn black depression.

Untill today, you got an email which reminds you that the deadline of work . Yes, you have to work again, its inescapable.
You won't know that only yourself can help you untill you wasted some time , you won't condemn yourslef untill you wasted a lot time on thinking, roaming, seeking help. Why seek strength from outside, not inside?

Be a brave women, you know you are, always.

A early bird

For fresh air, for get more energy, in the morning.

In this summer, be a early bird.


I feel sorry that I wasted a few time, done nothing but only depressed

Can I overcome the depression next time?

Tuesday, 23 June 2009

This summer

1.Get up around 7am

2.Go to library around 8:30.

3. Study around 4 hours every day.

4. Go out at afternoon, do whatever I like.

5.Jogging, Yogo, sports...every evening. Just need to sweat..

6.Talk to friends everyday, for at least 30 min.

7.Smile, sing.

8.Have an outing at weekend, travel as much as I can. To visit beautiful places, countryside, beach.

9. A long trip in July or Aug, after finish my thesis.

10. Quit facebook.

That's me..:)

Tired of studying....

Friday, 5 June 2009

Mulan, the journey of a herione

9am,Bortherton. I still cant concentrate on studying. I tried to read "Orientalism", but tired. Ok, why not a film? Mulan, Yes!

The legend of Hua Mulan is quite famous in China, which is about a young cross-dressing Chinese woman who runs away to take her father's place in the Emperor's army , and eventually, saves the country. The animated film produced by Disney is based on this story.

The story set in Han Dynasty, while Shan Yu invades china , the emperor conscript the male soilders all over the country. Having no son to fight, Mulan''s father is forced to enlist despite his age and disability. In order to protect her father and family, Mulan poses as a man and flees to join the army in his place.

During the time in the army, she overcomes many obstacles . At first, she has to disguize as man in the army and not to be found out. Secondly, she is physically challenged during the training. Nevertherless, she overcomed and eventually saves everybody and the country by using her intelligence and skills. Owing to her prominent deed in fighting Shan Yu, she is rewarded the emperor's crest and Shan Yu's sword. The king offers her a job in cabinet position as well which is at last refused by Mulan.

"You don't meet a girl like THAT every dynasty",advising by the emperor , Shang , the captain who Mulan likes, followes Mulan to return her hometown. Thus, eventually, it's a story with a happy ending which praises love, loyalty,courage, fame. The girl is shaped as a model who devotes to family, country, which are the main concepts in Confucianism.

Clearly, it's a sucessful film, at least it won Chinese audiences(It was said that Disney wanted to smooth the relationship with Chinese goverment after being accused the production of Kundun, the story about Dalai Lama). Moreover, I have to say, it's a film makes me laugh, and relaxed, even cheered me up. It's a fun film with good narrativation, sound effect and design. In all, it's a American story about a heroine who defeat the evil and saves the world , added Chinese traditional elements such as Kongfu , history. Mulan, is a counterpart of Michelle Yoeh? Anyway, it doesn't matter as long as it's a good film to amuse audiences.

However, while watching the film , I am thinking about how western people portray east. 1, While Mulan and her teammembers made up as women to rescue the emperor, why do they appear as Japanese Geisha? 2. the cherry flowers in Mulan's home, is no doubt like the flowers in Japan, not China. Haha.. For western people, the easterns are probably the similiar. 3. I can't forget the eyes of Mulan, really like Lucy Liu. The typical eyes who ancient chinese prefer, afterwards Western people like, and can be found from Chinese girls in all western films. What a typical eyes.. 4. when Mulan was discovered as a girl, she was supposed to excute despite her achievement in war. What a shame! The poor status of female has been shown or criticized in this part of the film .

At last, I was touched by the eastern virtues presented in this film. Love, Faith, Courage, Be loyal to country and family....those virtues we knew by heart gradually has fading away under the impact of western and commercial cultures. From the button of my heart, I recogonize and appreciate those virtues. East culture, for me, likes the old white-haired emperor, who is benevolent, amiable, tolerant, knowledgable and wise.

P.S I recomend an interesting article on http://www.worsethanqueer.com/slander/mulan.

Tuesday, 2 June 2009

Why blog?

Cause it's my world.
Like my small garden.

Super blogger is back, that's me.